Sandbox Politics (or It's My Football and I'm Going Home!)

As global warming feels the icy cold fingers of February on it's throat the nation's capital is beset by more than just snow and ice, but also the rather amusing efforts of stand-up comedian president hussein, who has become positively riotous in his sophomore year as he does Jerry Lewis-level pratfalls all over the place insisting that everyone play nice.

As with all great comedy, it's a matter of just how much truth there is in the joke, and in this case it's rife with reality. The Republicans, only a year ago getting sound advice on how they can stay relevant from the beneficent likes of the Associated Press have crafted a strategy that is reaping tremendous benefits in re-stabilizing the nation.

First they became the "Party of No". Sending a clear and loud signal that if there WERE going to be a Health-Care agenda rammed down an unwilling America's throat it was only going to have the DNA of Democrats on it.

Second they kept their yaps largely shut. Oh sure, the occasional "You Lie" creeps out from time to time, but the real howlers, the kind that rank hussein up there with his peers, Leno and O'Brien (but not, it seems, Jon Stewart.... who is still ahead of the game...), keep coming from the Dem big wigs. The Republicans have been making statements, but they are largely intelligent and prepared statements expressing their concerns.

Third they have found a comfortable way to start utilizing Sarah Palin. Via the Tea Party platform Mrs. Palin has found a rich and welcoming audience to counter the horrific attacks the elite left have thrown at her. In fact the most impressive charge levelled against her so far from the Tea Party event was her use of some buzzwords penned onto her palm... a far cry form having to have every word uttered be displayed on a teleprompter. By attacking her for this they are only reasserting her down-home folksy image with the rest of us.

And for his part, president hussein is happily playing the fool the way we really want him to... he's vigorously defending his Healthcare agenda even as his distaff troops are shuffling away from him in slow yet unmistakable moves. His insistence that not only Healthcare... which is bad enough... but only HIS healthcare.... be kept alive is a little like Jim Jones kicking back and pointing out he's parched, and asking for a tall cool one of Grape Kool Aid. A bit twistedly sick, with truly dark consequences, but surprisingly mind-numbingly funny in its way.

So now hussein is kicking and huffing and puffing that no one is nice and no one wants to play football under HIS rules, and he's just plain irritated about it.

That's life in the city, mr. president. Being handed a title and having hundred dollar a pound steak dinners doesn't get you respect. And insisting that others play by your rules when you can't be bothered to follow them is a bit disingenuous, don't you think?

I've never been a big fan of snow, although I used to play in it when I was a kid, and you learn to turn the frustrating parts of it into a game. Slogging through two-foot deep snow only becomes fun when you get to ride a sled down the hill afterward.

That's something you learn growing up. The hard times aren't worth a dime if they don't lead to better times. And all we are asking is for a president who envisions and works toward better times.

And since "That One" isn't filling the bill it's time to find one of our own.

I'm Dr. Calamity and I approve this message.